Are You A Hopeful or Hopeless Romantic For Christ Jesus?

Me, A Hopeful Romantic

One of the fun things about Spring and Summer is that the wedding season comes to life in our neck of the woods. Outdoor weddings in the fresh mountain air are so beautiful, as are indoor weddings, but something about the outdoor ones are special to me. Love is always in the air along with that fresh pine scent.

I don’t own or watch television any more but I do love a good Hallmark Movie occasionally when I want to just sit and settle down from a busy day or better yet, on a cold winter night. My husband will not watch one with me but he always smiles when he sees me sit in the chair and turn on my laptop to watch a hallmark movie. He just goes about his business and leaves me be. Every now and then he will remind me that I have not stopped smiling the whole time I am watching. I silently chuckle because that means he is silently listening or looking at me to notice I am smiling.

Not long ago, I was watching a movie and jokingly I told my husband that I must be a ‘hopeless romantic.’ I instantly heard the Holy Spirit say, “No, you are a hopeful romantic.” I didn’t even know there was such a thing so I had to look it up. Hence, this blog post.

Over the course of the past two months, I have enjoyed watching some short nine or ten minute clips on the various shows, “Say Yes To The Dress”. I know, I know…some of you are thinking “how cheesy!”. Hear me out. There is just something about these Brides-To-Be picking out their dresses and the entourage accompanying them that has amazed me and had me thinking about some really profound things.

In most of the shows, the mother of the bride has her outspoken opinion about what she’d like to see her daughter wear. Some grandmothers or sisters will have their opinion, and in almost all the shows, at some point the bride-to-be gets her bubble burst and feelings hurt by their opinions…until…drum roll please…that special dress and the bride-to-be gets ‘jacked up’ with the veil and jewelry. Then, just like magic, it all comes together and all are in one accord with the dress. The bride-to-be feels like a true bride and says “YES to the dress.” But this is not my favorite part of the show.

My favorite part is when they show the wedding day and watching the groom’s reaction when he sees his beautiful bride coming down the aisle. The look on his face, the tears in his eyes, the overwhelming feeling of abundant joy that says, “this woman is saying ‘Yes’ to be my bride, my wife!” YES, this is the part that gets me every time.

When I first started watching the clips, I was perplexed at why a bride would bring so many people with her to give their opinion of her dress for ‘Her’ day. Some of my honest thoughts were: Is she a glutton for punishment? Can she not make a decision on her own or wouldn’t just one witness be much easier? Why would she be so concerned about what other people think about her wedding garment? It’s her wedding! Why would family and friends be so opinionated as though it is their wedding day and not hers? Is this a form a peer pressure? Idolatry? Do they really have her best interest at heart?

I realize, of course, that this show is made for entertainment, but I like to look at things in a deeper, more intimate perspective and how it can relate to our relationship to Yeshua HaMashiach (Jesus Christ). We are called to be His bride and how we prepare for our Wedding Day with Yeshua will determine whether we are selected to become His bride or if we show up as an invited guest at the wedding and are not welcomed in.

Revelation 19:6-9

And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude, as the sound of many waters and as the sound of mighty thunderings, say, “Alleluia! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigns! Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready.” And to her it was granted to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints.

Then he said to me, “Write: Blessed are those who are called to the marriage supper of the Lamb!” And he said to me, “These are the true sayings of God.”

Every time I read the above scriptures in the Bible, I can’t help but feel my heart begin to race a bit. It is my heart’s desire to stand before my bridegroom and have him look at me with those very same tears of joy because He knows I have made myself ready to be his bride. I know on that great and glorious day, with all my humanly imperfections, my heart will still be Yeshua’s.

I am a hopeful romantic. I’m not assuming that things will just come together in my relationship with Yeshua’s unconditional love. I am preparing my heart, my soul, and body so that I may be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright. I know things can go wrong if I live in a lukewarm state of mind.

Matthew 22:1-14 (Parable of the Wedding Feast)

And Jesus answered and spoke to them again by parables and said: “The kingdom of heaven is like a certain King who arranged a marriage for his son, and sent out his servants to call those who were invited to the wedding; and they were not willing to come. Again, he sent out other servants, saying ‘Tell those who are invited. “See, I have prepared my dinner; my oxen and fatted cattle are killed, and all things are ready. Come to the wedding!” But they made light of it and went their ways, one to his own farm, another to his business. And the rest seized his servants, treated them spitefully, and killed them. But when the King heard about it, he was furious and He sent out his armies, destroyed those murderers, and burned up their city. Then he said to his servants, ‘The wedding is ready, but those who were invited were not worthy. Therefore go into the highways, and as many as you find, invite to the wedding.’ So those servants went out into the highways and gathered together all who they found, both bad and good. And the wedding hall was filled with guests. But when the King came in to see the guests, he saw a man there who did not have on a wedding garment. So he said to him ‘friend, how did you come in here without a wedding garment?’ And he was speechless. Then the King said to the servants, ‘Bind him hand and foot, take him away, and cast him into outer darkness, there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’ For many are called, but few are chosen.”

I look back at my own wedding day. I was first married at age 20 and my mother most certainly had her opinion about how the wedding ceremony should be, where it should be, who I must invite (most of her and my father’s friends and family), and she made sure I had all the traditional items for a wedding. I had to have the something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. The only problem was, while my mother’s heart was with good intent, it was not the wedding event I would have chosen for myself. I remember taking her shopping with me to look at dresses and she ‘helped’ me decide on a dress that she felt would work. After careful consideration, I made the decision a few weeks later to go back to the bridal boutique and I picked out the dress I felt was right for me, as I just couldn’t settle in my heart for what someone else had decided for me. I went above my original budget a bit, but since I was paying for it, I picked what made me feel like a bride. I was by myself and had the absolute best experience trying on the dress, picking the veil, and saying “Yes” to that dress. Sadly, that marriage did not last long, as it was not built on an equally yoked foundation and was immediately shaken. I allowed myself to be deceived into thinking I was the ‘One’ he wanted to live happily ever after with and that it would all work out knowing we were unequally yoked. A hopeless romantic I was.

When I did divinely meet the man I was to be married to til death do us part, we didn’t tell anyone we were getting married and the two of us planned our wedding day the way we envisioned it and we invited everyone to come celebrate with us. It was the perfect day for us. We still smile 35 years later when we get to share with others how we met and how we got married. God is good and He knew the plans he had for us. It was just a matter of me waiting, hearing His voice, and not rushing into another relationship like the hopeless romantic I was at age 20. By then, I had come to realize that through the love of Yeshua and His grace, I had transitioned from a hopeless romantic to the hopeful romantic I am today (even though I had no language for it at the time).

My husband and I have been involved in the ministry of Yeshua HaMashiach for over 20 years and one of our callings has been to minister to married couples, couples that are thinking about marriage, and single men and women who one day want to get married. We are called to share the love of Yeshua and how He is to be at the center of every marriage ordained by Him. Our marriage on Earth is to be a reflection (type and shadow) of our marriage relationship to Him. If you are a single person, take a deep look at your marriage covenant with Jesus. It took us about 10 years to learn this and to begin to walk it out. Let’s just say that there were a lot of wrinkles in our wedding garments not to mention the gaping holes in our armor. We knew God had joined us together but we still were conforming to the world and what society’s version of marriage should be. We were floundering about like two fish out of water and gasping for air as we struggled to keep it together for ourselves and our children. We watched many of our friends divorce and the reasons for the divorces were crazy. We had to take a step back and ask ourselves what was important to us.

We began to seek God’s will for our lives and the more we sought him, the more He began to speak to us. He intervened and only by His love and grace we were able to get on track with His plan for our marriage. We had to make a decision and take a firm stand on that which God had joined together, we would not allow the enemy to use man (or the world) to tear us apart. We chose to start again; and, this time we opened our Bibles and invited Yeshua through His Holy Spirit to teach us His ways about a true marriage covenant. We renewed our vows before him and our life and relationship has not be the same since.

After about a year of our making the decision to honor Yeshua in our marriage and walking it out to the best of our ability came the day of July 4, 2004. I had planned to put on some shorts, get my lawn chair, and go sit outside in the warm sunshine for a few hours to just decompress from the busyness of the week prior. Well, the Holy Spirit had other plans for me (and those of you who have ears to hear). He told me to get my Bible, paper and a pen, and a concordance. He said He was going to give me a teaching on marriage and that my husband and I would be sharing it with many over the years to come. What began as a few hours of decompress mode turned into eight (8) hours of downloaded scriptures to research on what marriage is in the eyes of Yahweh. He even gave me a diagram to draw. He is preparing a bride for His son, Yeshua, and there is a divine pattern and order of which we are to prepare and be prepared.

Those eight hours were the most amazing eight hours I have ever spent with the Holy Spirit. I ran back into the house and grabbed my husband, telling and showing him all I was given. We then looked at each other in with a little bit of fear and hesitation and said, “okay, let’s see where we are at, how far we’ve come, and where we need to get to.” To our total amazement, we had come a long way over the previous year in our marriage and boy did we rejoice that lightning didn’t stike us. Lol. No lightning, just pure light. This was Yah’s way of letting us know He was pleased with our walk and He could now begin to use us as His vessels for His glory. The walk is a daily walk and we have learned so much, been tested in so many trials, but have grown to love, honor, and respect one another so much.

I recently heard a saying that really pierced through my soul and spirit like a two-edged sword.

“Many people add Jesus to their life, but to be His bride,we must fully submit our life unto Jesus.”

Wow! What a true statement. How many professing Christians have conveniently added Jesus to ‘their’ lives, while continuing a carefree lifestyle full of works of the flesh and only letting Him in when it is convenient? These same people tend to follow the masses rather than focus on their marriage covenant with Jesus. Unless they fully submit their life unto Jesus, their wedding garments will not be ready at the marriage of the Lamb. Unfortunately, there are doctrines of men that teach Christians that the things of the world are where its at. They have turned what should be a house of prayer into a den of vipers, laying heavy burdens on people, making their own ‘laws of God’, and leading many astray.

Yeshua addressed this type of people in Mark 7:6:

“this people honors Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me. In vain they worship Me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.”

It is here many people are deceived into being hopeless romantics. They just think all will be okay and say, “I’m a good person, I go to church, I tithe, I’m fine, love conquers all, etc.”, yet the minute they walk outside the building, they are right back into their fleshly lives with such works as envy, hatred, contentions, outburst of wrath, selfish ambitions, adultery, lewdness, murder, drunkenness, idolatry, etc. (Read Galatians 5:19-21)

These same works have crept into many marriages and relationships. These very works, thoughts, feelings (whatever we want to call them) leave huge stains and blemishes on our garments. We can con man, we can deceive ourselves, but we can NOT con Yahweh. He sees and knows everything, every lie, every hidden secret. This is truth. People end up in divorce, or just live a life a tolerance with lack of abundance.

For this hopeful romantic, I do not know when that great and fearful day of the Lord will come for me, so while I am still on this earth, I will yearn for Him, seek His face, commune with Him, listen to His voice and direction, love Him, honor Him, and seek to please Him with my heart and my actions. I will continually do a self check to see where I may get off track in my walk with Him (and He does show us when we are off track). I want to feel the warmth of His embrace through the good times and hard times, but my reality check is this: I recognize that I have a part to play in this relationship if I want it to work. I have to submit and surrender myself unto Him so that I can have that peaceful assurance that my husband has me covered in all things. I no longer sweat the small stuff that use to get me riled up. I no longer conform to the world and follow the masses. I do not jump just because someone tells me to. I no longer allow the words of scoffers and mockers to bother me. I keep my eyes on Yeshua! It is His thoughts and words that matter to me. I don’t need an entourage of people with their fleshly opinions speaking into my ears. I need Yeshua, first and foremost. It is through my relationship with Him that I can be the helpmate I was created to be to my earthly husband. The two of us have become one flesh and one in the spirit with Yeshua in the center. Where there was once contention, there is conferring with one another. Where there was once jealously, there is one accord, etc. We have grown old together and are in love more now than we could ever have imagined. We are truly become one flesh.

In Conclusion

There is a divine order that has been created for marriage covenants and when we apply that order to our marriage covenant with Yeshua, it will naturally flow to our spouse from Yeshua, to us and back to Him. It’s a win win every time! When the enemy sneaks in to bring discord, we know how to discern it and we can stop and pray it through. Our spiritual gifts are ignited and work for Yah’s glory.

If you are reading this and there are areas in your marriage or your walk with Yeshua that has gotten off the divine path, take some time right now to reach out to Him in prayer. Ask Him to show you His way and then make a decision to turn from that which you have known or walked in up until now. This is called repentance. It’s a decision and a discipline. You’ve got to want it and believe it. Yeshua is a forgiving God. If you ask and confess your sins (whatever they may be), they are forgiven. I invite you to read the blog called “Congratulations on Your Marriage.” This blog breaks down the divine order of marriage and how marriage on this earth is a type and shadow of our marriage covenant with Yeshua HaMashiach. Blessings and love to you, in Yeshua’s name.

Prayer

Father Yahweh, I come before your throne of grace and I thank you for your unfailing love. I thank you that you are a God of divine order and wisdom. I lift up each and every person that has read this blog and I pray that you will touch their heart and minister to their spirit, soul, and body. You are seeking a bride without blemish. I ask, in the name of Yeshua HaMashiach. (Jesus Christ) that you will give them a touch of your warm embrace. I pray that every chain that holds them captive to the world be broken now, in the name of Yeshua. I pray every curse ever spoken over their marriage, their spouse, their life, their body be broken now, in the name of Yeshua. I ask for a hedge of protection over their life, their marriage, their body and family, as they seek your divine order for their life. As they cry out to you, I ask you to break every stronghold of divination, jealousy, lying spirit, whoredom and heaviness. I ask you to reveal areas in their heart where the spirit of antichrist has set up shop and deliver them from this deception. You are our Redeemer, Yeshua. You came to this earth and died on the cross and was raised again on that third day so that whomever would believe in you would have everlasting life. Deliver all those called by your name, I pray, from all works of the devil and works of the flesh that has controlled lives for so long. Today, I choose You! I choose blessings over curses and life over death. I give you all the praise, glory, and honor. Amen.

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